I slept with my sister’s husband and I don’t regret it.

by Onyinye Ogbuka

I slept with my sister’s husband. I was tongue-tied, each word she said was like a sharp arrow poisoned with bitterness and I watched in tears as she talked. When she was done, I barged into my room and cried long and hard. I felt anger develop into something sinister. I was going to deal with her for what she said.

I slept with sister’s husband; Hatred

I look at my sister in annoyance as she loves up on her hubby. Can’t they just get themselves into the room and spare me all that irritating sight. 

I try my best to concentrate on my phone but I still feel slight irritation. They are still doing what they are doing without acknowledging my presence. I don’t want to talk because she would use that as an opportunity to tease me about getting married.

I don’t like that the fact that I had to move here and live with my sister. Seeing her constantly reminds me of my failure as a woman. She is everything that I am not and I hate it. 

I slept with my sister’s husband; That I was never born

Having grown up in a middle-class family, my younger sister, Ara and my elder brother and I attended good schools. However, Ara was the brainy one among us, she was the one that seemed to receive my father’s praises and my mother’s accolades. She was the one who could literally point to anything and my parents would fall over themselves trying to get it for her.

My parents seemed to appreciate brains over beauty and maybe that was why when they looked in my direction they couldn’t see me, they couldn’t see how beautiful I was. I developed an interest in beauty pageantry and the way they turned up their nose when I mentioned it to them the first time discouraged me. I had to follow my heart at the expense of their praises.

It’s annoying that she is the one that gets all the good stuff. She is the one that attended a reputable university while I had to attend the average one. As the older of both of us, I also deserved the best but my parents did not think so. I wanted to attend the reputable university my sister attended but I didn’t make the cutoff. A lesson teacher would help me do better but my parents said if I can’t study on my own to get an entry into the university, I should attend the one that could take my average performance. 

Priorities and I am not there

My parents did not grace my graduation because it fell on the same day as that of my sister’s. I masked my pain and did all the running around myself to ensure my graduation went well. It was only my elder brother that came around to take pictures and he left immediately after that. My younger sister’s graduation went well, obviously it would because my parents kept fussing over her. They went as far as printing souvenirs to celebrate her graduation. Such a grandiose gesture from people who merely asked how mine went and that was the end. My sister did not disappoint; she graduated as the overall best student in her department and received tons of awards.

Much to my displeasure, she got a scholarship abroad for her Master’s. That was one of the most trying periods of my life. I wished the earth would open up and swallow me. My parents did not let me hear the end of it, it was terrible.

Cold and alone.

There was nothing more important than me a getting job so I could move out and I breathed a sigh of relief when I got one. It was not the kind of job I wanted but beggars can’t be choosers. My first salary facilitated my moving out. 

Moving out was the best thing that ever happened to me. It threw me into the full realities of adulthood but if this was the price I had to pay for my sanity then so be it. It was also going to be my greatest mistake. I got involved with a married man, I did not know he was married. All my thought was that he loved me and I loved him. I was already dreaming of wedding gowns, Aso oke and Asoebis, finally, I could do something right just before my younger sister. The castles I had built in the air came crashing down when I ecstatically told him I was pregnant and he said he was married and would not want to have a child outside wedlock. I was crushed and broken. 

Abortion was not an option, how do I tell my parents I am pregnant? When they finally found out, I was hit with a barrage of insults but I waved it aside and carried my child full term. How many grandparents can turn their grandchild away? I was fortunate, they accepted the child with open arms. They coaxed me into leaving my child with them when she was weaned and I conceded.

I slept with my sister’s husband; shame and it’s ranks.

Two years after I gave birth, my sister came back with her fiance; tall, dark and handsome, well-to-do and with a great pedigree, he qualified as an eligible bachelor. She was getting everything right and I was getting it all wrong. She and her fiance had decided to relocate to Nigeria and alongside get their wedding done. They both had lucrative careers that were paying as much as a million per month.  If I felt low, then with the news of her impending marriage to her fiance, I felt inconsequential.

Just as I expected, the barrage of snide remarks that could send someone into depression was all I received during the wedding. It was highly degrading as I was reduced to being the errand girl, nobody ever saw me and believed I was the sister to the bride, the elder sister at that. 

The wedding was beautiful and my sister seemed haughty like she didn’t want to associate with me. It was painful but I waved it. The lighting, the decor and the whole ambience were things I would ever wish for. It was the wedding of my dreams. It was just sad that all the men I met wanted a roll in the hay. Not one among them was interested in walking down the aisle with me.

I slept with my sister's husband/mildstrings/Pinterest pin

Cursed of the lot.

The worst that can happen is that I lose my job, and lost my job a few months after my sister got married. The company where I worked had crossed some restrictions set by the government and it had been closed by the government leading to me automatically losing my job. I spiralled into depression while trying to find another job, the more I got turned down, the more depressed I was. In no time, my savings had quickly depleted and I was unable to pay my bills, thus I had to move out of my rented house. 

Where else would I go if it’s not to my parents’? Staying with them was hell. It was shameful to be disgraced and disregarded in the presence of my child. They felt they could not feed me and feed my child. When my sister heard of it, she suggested that I come stay with her and look for a job in her state. Grateful to be out of my parents’ hair and grateful to my sister, I did not waste time moving to her place.

She accommodated me but years of watching our parents belittle me had rubbed off on her, however, it was subtle and I ignored it.

I slept with my sister’s husband and I don’t regret it.

A few months into my stay with the young couple, I found out they were having problems in their marriage. My sister was a workaholic with little time for her husband and he always complained about it. 

They would schedule a date and she would cancel last minute because she wanted to work. It was getting on her husband’s nerves each passing day. One day, their quarrel spiralled out of control and they were shouting at each other. I had to get between them to separate them. I successfully calmed her husband down and promised to talk to my sister on his behalf. When my sister had calmed down, I talked to her and advised her to spend more time with her husband and cut back on work. Making all the money in this world without her husband to enjoy it with her was not going to help her marriage.

She flared up because to her, I don’t have the right to talk to her, I don’t have my life in order and as such, I am disqualified from advising her. She listed all her achievements and how I had none to my name. The one that broke the camel’s back was when she said I go around sleeping with married men hoping they will marry me and because of that my biggest achievement is a bastard child. In comparison to me, she had a legitimate husband and did not have a bastard anywhere.

I was tongue-tied, each word she said was like a sharp arrow poisoned with bitterness. I watched on in tears as she talked. When she was done, I barged into my room and cried long and hard. I felt anger develop into something sinister. I was going to deal with her for what she said.

I slept with sister’s husband; naked fires, inflamed heat.

I set my plans in motion when I took over the kitchen, they usually ordered out most times even down to their soups. One thing I had was cooking, I started making their meals. Her husband would praise me for my tasty meals and I would wave it off right in front of her. It delighted me secretly. Whenever my sister was away for work, I would strike up conversations with him and he would open up to me over his struggles and his successes. It was subtle but over time it became an activity he always looked forward to. We would sit down over good food and have good conversations. I took it up a notch wearing revealing outfits, I knew how I looked, my postpartum body was the kind of body celebrities went under the knife for. 

It didn’t come as a surprise the day I kissed him and he returned it with equal fervour. I knew my plan had worked, there were no doubts in his eyes as we had sex on his matrimonial bed.  When we were through, he looked guilty but I did not care. I was going to destroy her so-called successful marriage since she said I am only good at sleeping with married men, her husband is no excuse. It was as if I had cast a spell on her husband; he had difficulty keeping his hands off me, he wanted me every time and I gave in every time.

Can a woman marry her sister’s husband?

My sister caught us the day, she came around to pick some files, he was pounding furiously into me when she came in, I met her eyes and smiled sinisterly as I made more sounds to encourage him.

She ran out and later came back in the evening to quarrel with her husband and me. Her husband was shocked she found out but he was not sorry. She wanted me out of the house but he insisted that if anyone must leave it had to be her since she was married to her work. I did not lift a finger but I had her husband at my beck and call.

My parents called and I hung the call on them. I am enjoying the show. There is chaos all around, both families are calling and trying to reconcile, my sister has moved out and her husband still wants me badly, I am calm and undisturbed. It might not last forever but I am glad to have left irreparable damage, still, I am calm and undisturbed.


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