The conversations about sex these days are quite controversial. But no matter how one tries to avoid having such conversations, it just has a way of popping up.
Talks and sexual questions like how many people you have had sex with (body counts)? How do love to have sex? what’s your favorite sex position and a whole lot of other sexual questions to determine if your sexual energy matches or you might need to step up your game in the bedroom.
Sexual compatibility is of uttermost importance in relationships. For matured adults entering a new relationship or an existing relationship, If the sex talk is not trashed earlier on, it could create a tussle in the overall relationship. Where your partner has different expectations which are totally different from what you can deliver or do.
sexual communication or conversation is a must, whether you are outspoken or not it has to be said and dealt with in other to have a smooth, loving, and romantic relationship.
If you and your partner or potential partner are on the same page, achieving a great sexual experience becomes a goal. However, before kicking off the bed games, there are certain questions to ask and conversations to engage yourselves in.
Knowing about your partners sexual preference, desires, fantasies, turn-ons, and turn-offs and sexual past is key to securing a great sexual experience. Here’s some guidance on how to ask your partner or potential partner sexually related questions.
Are you ready to be sexually committed?
Many at times couples or intended couples skip this part in their conversations, thinking that their partners would want the same thing they want without asking questions to confirm or know their stand in this regard. As partners or intending partners, you must seek to know each other’s sexual commitment.
Realistically, not everyone enters a relationship with the idea of having sex in the early stages. So it’s your responsibility to know your partner’s decision on whether they’re ready to have sex or not.
For an ongoing relationship or potential relationship, this is a good conversation to have as couples or potential couples. Most especially if you intend to explore new ideas(e.g open relationships ).
Have You Had Any Sex Complications, Scares or STDs?
Fear they say is an ingredient of destruction. You shouldn’t be afraid or scared of sharing your sexual health history with your partner. You and your partner should be able to give details of your past sexual experiences especially the aspects that deal with health.
If you’ve treated STIs or STDs in the past, sharing it with your partner is a very important step to take in having a very healthy sexual relationship.
This keeps you both off sexual risks and the intention to always take medical checks seriously so as to further avert any form of diseases that are transmitted sexually. Don’t wait till your partner finds out. You both should know or have each other’s records upfront before getting involved sexually.
It is important to also ask if there has been any past pregnancy scare, or abortions, or miscarriages. you want to have this information to be sure and to be on the same about wanting to conceive or not.
You want to know if your partner prefers using protection or would rather be on birth control if she is not open to conceiving and the method of family planning that would be good for you both.
What Are Your Sexual Fantasies And Desires?
Naturally, fantasies are meant to be spicy secrets kept to oneself, however, you shouldn’t be selfish not to share them with your partner or potential partner.
Don’t underestimate the curiosity of your partner. Asking your partner about his or her fantasies and desires helps you know their sexual preferences and wants.
Sharing your sexual fantasies sparks more closure with your partner, gives you both the drive to explore more options and ideas to improve your sexual relationship. It also puts you and your partner on the scale of planning future surprises.
Feel free to share fantasies, desires with your partner. If you both agree, you can watch explicit movies, read romantic novels. This is to improve your sex life and also to avoid a boring bed experience.
You both can decide to make a list of fantasies and desires. Afterward compare both lists and then compile both lists into a master list.
What turns you on and off?
This is quite a very interesting sexual question to ask. What puts you both in the mood to get down to having sex is ultimately an important conversation you both would be glad to have or have had.
Knowing how to touch your partner, where to touch your partner(i.e. weak spot or soft spot), when also to touch your partner, and knowing how to please your partner is a very sensitive aspect of your sexual relationship.
Another very important knowledge of your partner’s sexual life is knowing what turns your partner off most especially during sex. It is important to be very intentional about what puts your partner off sexually.
How Often Do Like To Have Sex?
It might seem like your partner is a freak because he or she asks for sex too often. Different people with their body systems and sexual drives.
This is the main reason why you must know how long, how often, and what time your partner loves having sex so as to avoid issues of less satisfying sex which may lead to self-gratification and most often make one look for more satisfying options outside.
Some partners might love morning sex, noon sex, or night sex. This shouldn’t be far from your knowledge in order to reach a suitable compromise with your partner. Some partners love sex twice every day, some may be twice or thrice a week or even three times a month or less.
Unavoidably, your partner’s sexual drive might be a bit higher than yours or vice versa. Also, this conversation helps you know better what time of the day your partner wants or loves to have sex. It opens the door for dialogue and a consensus that benefits both parties.
Be intentional about your partner’s sexual drive, fantasies, and sexual life in general. This gives you both the ground to agree and also opens doors for improvement. It’s advisable that you and your partner indulge in these conversations before getting too intimate.